How We Got Here...

Where to begin? Nick and I were married in May of 2002. Although it has always been my lifelong dream to be a mom, I was very excited to begin my new life as a wife and enjoy a few years with my new husband before entering the joys of motherhood. I never imagined in a million years that I... or we would soon be a part of the painful world of infertility. After all, the Lord wants me to be a mom...He wants us to be parents! Without telling anyone, we started trying to get pregnant in the late fall of 2005. At first it was fun and exciting. We were just so anxiously waiting the day when we could surprise our family and friends with the news that "We're pregnant!" Month after month went by and many home pregnancy tests were thrown in the trash.

It wasn't until May of 2007 (about a year and a half later) that we decided we needed to seek help. Something wasn't right. First, Nick went in for semen analysis. Even though the results of the analysis weren't good, I was relieved. This is it! This is why we haven't gotten pregnant. You see...I have a few friends that have battled "unexplained infertility." We considered it a blessing to have an answer to our failed pregnancy attempts and were excited to move forward with the help of a fertility specialist. Our first step in September of 2007 was a round of Clomid with IUI....unsuccessful. Then, my doctor wanted to perform a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG). Basically, its an X-ray that runs dye through my tubes to make sure there is no blockage. Another answer...my right tube was blocked. My doctor then scheduled my surgery so that he could go in and unblock my tube. During the surgery, the doctor discovered that I had a bad case (stage 4) of endometriosis....which was a surprise to both of us because I had no usual symptoms of the disease. The doc was able to get it all out...praise the Lord! My doctor advised me to go on a medicine called Lupron Depot to prevent me from producing estrogen which feeds endometriosis. Basically, I was in a reversible menopause for 3 months...hot flashes and mood swings that go along with it! Poor Nick...although, he found the hot flashes humorous since I am normally all wrapped up with a blanket even in the dead of the summer! April 2008, our next try of Clomid with IUI. In my mind, this was going to be it! Unsuccessful. This one knocked me to my knees. WHY God? WHEN God? When is this suffering going to be enough? My answer: "Kami, I AM in control...I love you and I will bless you. Be patient and faithful."

Our next step was to meet with our doctor about in vitro fertilization(IVF.) We felt the Lord was leading us down this path...so we followed. My procedure wasn't scheduled until August 2008 because I had to gear up by taking many hormones to prepare my body for the surgery. Also, in the meantime we were able to do another round of Clomid with IUI which was the 3rd unsuccessful attempt.

*These are the two embryos that were transferred.

The day we found out was Sunday August 17th, 2008. We came home from church and I went in the bathroom to do the test by myself. I wanted to be able to tell Nick and enjoy his reaction...I never wanted to forget his face! As soon as I saw the plus sign...I couldn't contain myself. I ran into the living room where he was watching TV and asked him "Are you ready to be a Daddy?" He jumped up and we held each other while we laughed and cried! We hugged forever! God is so good!

Now when we learned I was pregnant, I was only 4 weeks along. We would have to wait another 2 1/2 weeks before doing our first ultrasound. Our first ultrasound was on September 4th. We went in and the doc prepared us that we may not see a heartbeat and that would be okay because I was still so early. "If we don't see a heartbeat, we will have to see one by next week." He began the ultrasound. "Or we could see two heartbeats!" And that's how we found out we were having twins! Here is our ultrasound picture from that visit. You can see each embryo in there own placenta which means we are having fraternal twins.

TWINS...twice blessed! We were thrilled and so was everyone else. It took a few days for it to sink in...but we were ready! I think God knew we were going to need two...Nick and I have waited so long to have a baby...now we wouldn't have to fight over 1! :)

Our next appointment was scheduled for a week later...which was this past Thursday. We had another ultrasound. If you don't know me very well or even if you do, you know I LOVE surprises! I am often hard to surprise because I just know when something's up and I am determined to figure it out...I know, its a sickness! Anyway, I can honestly say this was the biggest surprise of my LIFE...and it was orchestrated by the Lord! Again, this was just another routine ultrasound. We saw the one placenta, one baby....second placenta....uh..."how many are in there?" I counted 2. "Two?" Doc said yes. "So it's triplets?" Tears of joy ran down my face. I looked up at Nick and he was grinning from ear to ear. We really couldn't believe it! Then, the Doc said "uhh...no, there is three in there....look." I counted 3. My tears of joy turned to tears of fear. Not fear of the number of babies, but I had immediate concern for my precious babies' health...with each baby their is increased risk. After he was finished, Nick finally asked "so, doc...what was your final count?" "Four."

FOUR LITTLE LAMBES! There are two placentas, one with one baby-the fraternal and in the other placenta - 3 identical triplets.

Immediately, Nick called our parents, both awesome Christian examples in our lives, to come over so we could tell them the news. As you can imagine, we were both a bit overwhelmed...it's not everyday you learn that your family of two...no four....will now become six! The more we talked and voiced our fears...the more peace that surrounded all of us. We know these babies are a blessing and that HE allowed this to happen. We also know that HE doesn't make any mistakes. Sure, we still have fears...will they be healthy, will I be on bedrest and how soon, do we have to get a bigger house, what about a bigger vehicle, will I continue to work, how can we afford this if I don't...you probably get the picture, but we are going to pray through this just the way we have been and know that the Lord will give us the answers. This is one of the Bible verses that helped me through my infertility struggle and now seems even more relevant with our current situation:

"Don't be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:6-7

P.S. I am new to blog world...I promise they all won't be this long. Thank you for allowing us to share our journey with you. Please keep us and the babies in your prayers....we desire a healthy pregnancy and healthy babies...all the while God is being glorified!